This evening, in an attempt to distract myself from the loneliness I feel when Nephi goes to work, I watched some movies. Not an altogether rare occurrence for me. In fact, that is what I usually do. First I started with the movie Amazing Grace. I have this slight obsession with period pieces, and I have heard many people talk about how good this movie is, so I gave it a viewing. It wasn't that good. Not bad, just...not good.
After Amazing Grace I was feeling up to a romantic comedy. Nephi rented It's Complicated, but he also expressed a desire to watch it, so I decided to go ahead and wait for him. I put in The Holiday instead (a personal favorite). As always, it was good.
After that was over, I only had about an hour and a half before Nephi got home so I went straight to the animated section. The Little Mermaid popped out to me, so I put it in. In the opening sequence when the fish escapes from the boat and swims deep into the ocean and we get to see a bunch of merpeople swimming to Atlantis, I got tingles in my tummy. It made me think about how when I was a kid I would watch this movie over and over and I wanted to be a mermaid SO bad. I even remember having this very involved dream when I was about 7 where I became a mermaid. I remember when I woke up, I was devastated and quickly tried to fall back asleep to continue the dream. Remembering this childhood desire, I realized...I still want to be a mermaid.
A few years ago while Nephi and I were walking on a pier in San Francisco I remember telling him, "I should probably be embarrassed by the fact that I am 21 years old, and my greatest desire is to be a mermaid, but...I'm not." And it is the truth. I feel this desire nearly anytime I go swimming (though the desire is stronger when I go swimming in the ocean). Whenever I am in water, I feel like I belong there. Like I was made to swim...not walk. I LOVE water and it makes me so happy to play around in it. As a kid I would swim every day, all day throughout the summer. As I got older, I stopped spending my summers by the pool (who knows why really). This summer I fully intend on living at the pool. I am also going to Hawaii and look forward to those really happy feelings that being in the ocean gives me.
After thinking about this childhood dream, I started thinking about others. When I was a child, I really wanted to be a professional singer. I love music almost as much as I love water, and I have always loved to sing. Growing up my parents encouraged it highly and complimented me often. All throughout school I participated in choir and musicals. After high school I took a year and a half off from school so I had no opportunities to sing. Then once I got to college, I just didn't put forth any effort to get involved in that stuff. It is something I regret because while I can obviously still sing, I have sorta lost a lot of the skills I used to have. I also realized as an adult that I was not nearly as good at singing as I always thought growing up. Even though I will obviously never be a professional singer (nor do I want to be any longer), I really want to start participating in church choir so that I can redevelop those skills.
Finally, as a kid I really wanted to get married and have a huge family (a fairly realistic dream for one with such an active imagination). I dreamed of having a husband who would love me more than anything else and we would be together forever. My parents were divorced and that was something I promised myself I would never do if I could avoid it. Now that I am grown up, I have accomplished part of this dream. I have a wonderful husband who I have been married to for 5 years! It seems crazy to me that I should be lucky enough to find someone who loves me so early in life. Of course, the other part of my dream is a work in progress. I still want a relatively large family (though I don't want the 12 children I originally wanted), and it is something that I really ache for. When I first got married I only wanted babies. Now I see teenagers with their parents and it makes me want my own. It has really gotten pathetic. Anyway...hopefully within the next couple of years the second part of this dream will be well on its way.
I know this is a kinda random post, but as I started thinking about my childhood dreams, I realized not much has changed. I still want to be a mermaid, though now I have a firmer grasp of how impossible this is. Instead I am going to try and be better about going to the pool and swimming. Not only does it make me so happy, but it is also a good way to exercise so why not take advantage of this? I still really love music and to sing, so why not work on developing my skills and talents in that area? While I may not want 12 children, I still want to be surrounded by the love of my husband and future children. Why not do better at developing and showing that love TO my husband?
Sometimes we think about how silly children are with their imaginations and their out of this world dreams, but are they really? I hope I never forget the dreams I had when I was a kid as they reveal a lot of truths about who I am today. So...what was YOUR childhood dream?
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
News to Me
So I pretty much read the news all the time. I would say that I check news websites every couple of hours on average. Obviously I am very up on what is going on at any given time. I read about my local community at www.ksl.com, I read about national, worldwide, and entertainment news at www.comcast.net, and I read about movie news at www.rottentomatoes.com.
I am not sure when this compulsion started, but it is definitely something I have a hard time controlling. The idea of being away from the internet, and thus news, for any given amount of time freaks me out a bit. I like knowing what is going on.
I bring this up because as of late I have started noticing how much certain news stories get to me. Sometimes they cause me to have positive feelings and sometimes they have the opposite effect. Either way...some news stories leave me thinking for days to come.
Take this one for example: http://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=148&sid=10247472
The above link is an article about how Utah needs more permanent foster homes for teenagers. After reading this article I started thinking about whether I would ever be willing to open my home to a complete stranger. I thought about how if something happened to me and all of my family, I would want someone to take care of my theoretical children. I have thought about fostering kids a lot, as Utah also likes to advertise the importance of the concept through billboards.
Anyway, I really started thinking about the idea and I got all hot on it. Like...I want to foster a teenager. Obviously I started really thinking about the logistics. Would a teenager be more expensive than a baby? Yes. Would a teenager take more time than a baby? Maybe, maybe not. Would a teenager be more emotionally exhausting? Definitely. Am I even old and mature enough to deal with the issues that present themselves with a teenager? I honestly have no clue. I still haven't really come to any hard and fast conclusions on whether or not having a teenager would be that much bigger of an adjustment than having a baby.
Obviously I don't have room, money, or time for a teenager right now, but I think that once Nephi and I are both out of school it is something I really want to do. I don't know if I'll ever convince Nephi, but I can only imagine the importance of the impact that would have on a person's life. The part of the article that touched me the most was when they talked about the family who still keeps in contact with their foster child even though they are out of the house. I can only hoped to be so blessed to add someone else into my family. I don't know...maybe I'm idealistic.
Another news story that I can't seem to get out of my head is from today: http://www.comcast.net/articles/news-general/20100405/US.Mine.Explosion/
I haven't read this article word for word or anything, but the headline pretty much does it for me. Apparently there was an explosion in a mine in West Virginia and 25 people died. I totally understand that more than 25 people die all the time, but something about this really depresses me. As I tried to go to bed tonight I found that I couldn't sleep. I couldn't get the image of a woman crying in her bed knowing her husband will never come home out of my head. I guess I feel strangely responsible that I live a life that requires that we send people under the earth to mine coal. It feels so primitive. In fact, when you think about it...mining is something that my subconscious thinks doesn't exist anymore. Obviously I know better (as my mother works for a gold mining company), but it still feels so far removed from my life.
Reading the news usually makes me want to be a better person...which is a good thing since it could easily have a different effect. I could just as easily feel like the world is a sad and hopeless place after reading the news, but I really never feel that way. I just feel like I want to do what I can to be better. I want to foster a teenager and change a life. I want to be grateful that I have grown up in a manner that provides me with a surety that my husband will not be forever lost underground. How blessed I am and I am glad that the news puts that into perspective for me.
Speaking of being blessed, I saw a trailer for Oceans today. I should preface this sub-topic by saying that I really don't enjoy nature shows. I was just telling my husband the other day how horrible I feel watching them. I realized this after having to watch 20 minutes of Planet Earth or Blue Planet or something during flex-time at school. The "episode" had wolves and good old Sigourney Weaver explained that the wolves were starving after a long winter. Instantly I was like, "Awww...poor wolves!" Of course, soon the wolves come across a herd of caribou. "Oh no!" I exclaim. As I watch a poor baby caribou get separated from its mother and then tackled by the wolf, my heart seriously aches and I feel sick. I don't feel any animosity towards the wolf...just sadness for the caribou. Anyway, I feel like it is a lose-lose situation. Either the caribou gets caught and dies, or the wolf starves. I really don't do well with animal deaths in any manner. Anyway...it is because of this constant stress and heartache that I can't watch nature shows. However, as I watched the trailer for Oceans (completely death free), I realized how truly amazing this world is. It has so much variety, color, and beauty. How can anyone live on it and not believe in Heavenly Father (not a diss to those people...I just don't get it). This world is stunning and we are so very lucky to live here.
P.S. If you haven't noticed...the first one or two songs in my playlist match the most recent blog post. This time it is the first two. :)
P.P.S. Please ignore any misuses of effect/affect. I have NEVER figured that one out.
I am not sure when this compulsion started, but it is definitely something I have a hard time controlling. The idea of being away from the internet, and thus news, for any given amount of time freaks me out a bit. I like knowing what is going on.
I bring this up because as of late I have started noticing how much certain news stories get to me. Sometimes they cause me to have positive feelings and sometimes they have the opposite effect. Either way...some news stories leave me thinking for days to come.
Take this one for example: http://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=148&sid=10247472
The above link is an article about how Utah needs more permanent foster homes for teenagers. After reading this article I started thinking about whether I would ever be willing to open my home to a complete stranger. I thought about how if something happened to me and all of my family, I would want someone to take care of my theoretical children. I have thought about fostering kids a lot, as Utah also likes to advertise the importance of the concept through billboards.
Anyway, I really started thinking about the idea and I got all hot on it. Like...I want to foster a teenager. Obviously I started really thinking about the logistics. Would a teenager be more expensive than a baby? Yes. Would a teenager take more time than a baby? Maybe, maybe not. Would a teenager be more emotionally exhausting? Definitely. Am I even old and mature enough to deal with the issues that present themselves with a teenager? I honestly have no clue. I still haven't really come to any hard and fast conclusions on whether or not having a teenager would be that much bigger of an adjustment than having a baby.
Obviously I don't have room, money, or time for a teenager right now, but I think that once Nephi and I are both out of school it is something I really want to do. I don't know if I'll ever convince Nephi, but I can only imagine the importance of the impact that would have on a person's life. The part of the article that touched me the most was when they talked about the family who still keeps in contact with their foster child even though they are out of the house. I can only hoped to be so blessed to add someone else into my family. I don't know...maybe I'm idealistic.
Another news story that I can't seem to get out of my head is from today: http://www.comcast.net/articles/news-general/20100405/US.Mine.Explosion/
I haven't read this article word for word or anything, but the headline pretty much does it for me. Apparently there was an explosion in a mine in West Virginia and 25 people died. I totally understand that more than 25 people die all the time, but something about this really depresses me. As I tried to go to bed tonight I found that I couldn't sleep. I couldn't get the image of a woman crying in her bed knowing her husband will never come home out of my head. I guess I feel strangely responsible that I live a life that requires that we send people under the earth to mine coal. It feels so primitive. In fact, when you think about it...mining is something that my subconscious thinks doesn't exist anymore. Obviously I know better (as my mother works for a gold mining company), but it still feels so far removed from my life.
Reading the news usually makes me want to be a better person...which is a good thing since it could easily have a different effect. I could just as easily feel like the world is a sad and hopeless place after reading the news, but I really never feel that way. I just feel like I want to do what I can to be better. I want to foster a teenager and change a life. I want to be grateful that I have grown up in a manner that provides me with a surety that my husband will not be forever lost underground. How blessed I am and I am glad that the news puts that into perspective for me.
Speaking of being blessed, I saw a trailer for Oceans today. I should preface this sub-topic by saying that I really don't enjoy nature shows. I was just telling my husband the other day how horrible I feel watching them. I realized this after having to watch 20 minutes of Planet Earth or Blue Planet or something during flex-time at school. The "episode" had wolves and good old Sigourney Weaver explained that the wolves were starving after a long winter. Instantly I was like, "Awww...poor wolves!" Of course, soon the wolves come across a herd of caribou. "Oh no!" I exclaim. As I watch a poor baby caribou get separated from its mother and then tackled by the wolf, my heart seriously aches and I feel sick. I don't feel any animosity towards the wolf...just sadness for the caribou. Anyway, I feel like it is a lose-lose situation. Either the caribou gets caught and dies, or the wolf starves. I really don't do well with animal deaths in any manner. Anyway...it is because of this constant stress and heartache that I can't watch nature shows. However, as I watched the trailer for Oceans (completely death free), I realized how truly amazing this world is. It has so much variety, color, and beauty. How can anyone live on it and not believe in Heavenly Father (not a diss to those people...I just don't get it). This world is stunning and we are so very lucky to live here.
P.S. If you haven't noticed...the first one or two songs in my playlist match the most recent blog post. This time it is the first two. :)
P.P.S. Please ignore any misuses of effect/affect. I have NEVER figured that one out.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Priorities
Well...I don't really feel like I have a ton to say, but I have a goal to write at least two posts per month and since it is the last day of the month and I only have one for March, I figured I better update.
It is job search time and I have to be honest, the stress is getting to me. It is such a crazy time to be searching for a job (especially for teachers) and I hate that it is a necessity. The people I express this to all tell me not to worry and that it will work out and even if it doesn't I'll find SOME job somewhere. Well the truth of the matter is...I don't want some job. After teaching for a year I cannot imagine myself doing anything else. I love it so much, which is something that I have never really found in a job. Searching for a job is so important, but I have a really hard time motivating myself to spend time doing it. I keep just hoping that positions will be available at the school I'm at now. Keep your fingers crossed for me.
I have a lot of things to look forward to in the next few months. First, Nephi and I will be celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary in three weeks. It seems insane to me that I have been married for 5 years. Wow. Seriously. I love Nephi dearly and I definitely got very lucky. 5 years is also a small milestone because before we got married we made a goal to wait at least 5 years before we had a baby. No one really thought we would make it (ourselves included sometimes), and while sometimes I want a baby so bad, I am really glad that Nephi and I have had so much time alone together. I am also grateful that I will have my degree by the time we have a baby, because I know that if I was still in school I would really struggle going back.
The day after our anniversary...I graduate! Yay! I am so excited. I have worked long and hard to get to this point and I am really proud of myself. School isn't really my favorite thing in the world, but I stuck it out and I did really well. I go to a top 100 school and managed to get a 3.8 GPA. Not bad.
From there, I have only one month before I will be finished with my first year of teaching. While I am really excited to be done with this year, because of the accomplishment and the following summer months of free time (my first in 4 years), it is a bit bittersweet. When I think about not seeing my kids anymore it makes me sad. Sometimes they drive me crazy, but I hate being away from them for even one day. I honestly don't know how I'll keep it together the last day.
3 days after the last day of school, Nephi and I leave on vacation. We are going to Seattle for 3 days and Hawaii for 14 days. We had free tickets on Southwest so I just found the cheapest place to fly to Hawaii from and it happened to be Seattle (somewhere I have never been). I decided that since we would be flying there anyway, we might as well spend some time there. We are going to spend a day and a half in Forks. I know it sounds lame, and while I do enjoy Twilight, I am mostly excited to see the green forests. I have never been in a forest like that before so that will be cool. I am also really psyched to go to the tide pools. I went to some tide pools in San Diego and they were lame. I am hoping these aren't...and from what I've read I have high hopes. Then we will spend two days in the actual city of Seattle. We decided to try this site called airbnb.com instead of staying in a hotel. It is this concept where people rent beds in their house. They range from air beds to sofa beds to shared bedrooms to private bedrooms. We found this nice couple who rent their extra room (private) with attached bath for $30 per night (about $70 cheaper than a hotel). I am excited to try this out and see how it works...Nephi is worried.
From Seattle we fly to Maui where we will spend 7 days. We plan on snorkeling, zip lining, hiking, and, of course, lying on the beach. From Maui we spend 3 days on Hawaii (the big island) where we will go to the Volcanos National Park and an observatory. Finally we will be on Oahu for 4 days. There we plan on taking a surfing lesson, going to the luau at the Polynesian Cultural Center, and hiking. Needless to say, I am beyond thrilled. I have always wanted to go to Hawaii and I am excited for the adventure.
A couple weeks after that, Twilight Eclipse comes out. I am pretty excited about that. I have always been someone who likes what I likes and could care less what others think...but that doesn't mean I'm not aware of what others think. I know that people think Twilight is silly, but I do really enjoy it. In fact, I just reread the whole series...in 5 days (this last Thursday-Monday). Yes that is right...I read about 2,445 pages in just 5 days. I know that probably isn't healthy, but I just can't help it. As much as people diss Stephenie Meyer, I just cannot put her books down. In fact, I was so sucked in that once I was finished with Breaking Dawn, I reread The Host. That one took me two days and it is only 619 pages, but I had work and such. This brings up my post title, "priorities." When I start reading...I have no priorities. All I want to do is read. I put off sleeping, eating, and everything else so that I can just keep reading. It is something I really need to work on because it is due to this fact that I don't start reading as often as I would like. I only start reading a book if I know I have time to finish it the the following couple of days. It would be good if I could just read a little bit everyday. Then I could read whatever I want, whenever I want.
This brings me to my final point. I hope to read a lot during the summer. I plan on reading the Fablehaven series, Water for Elephants, Wuthering Heights, and Jane Eyre. Hopefully I will read more than just those, but those are my musts for the summer.
Well...that was a bunch of random mumblings about why I am so excited for the next few months of my life. :)
It is job search time and I have to be honest, the stress is getting to me. It is such a crazy time to be searching for a job (especially for teachers) and I hate that it is a necessity. The people I express this to all tell me not to worry and that it will work out and even if it doesn't I'll find SOME job somewhere. Well the truth of the matter is...I don't want some job. After teaching for a year I cannot imagine myself doing anything else. I love it so much, which is something that I have never really found in a job. Searching for a job is so important, but I have a really hard time motivating myself to spend time doing it. I keep just hoping that positions will be available at the school I'm at now. Keep your fingers crossed for me.
I have a lot of things to look forward to in the next few months. First, Nephi and I will be celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary in three weeks. It seems insane to me that I have been married for 5 years. Wow. Seriously. I love Nephi dearly and I definitely got very lucky. 5 years is also a small milestone because before we got married we made a goal to wait at least 5 years before we had a baby. No one really thought we would make it (ourselves included sometimes), and while sometimes I want a baby so bad, I am really glad that Nephi and I have had so much time alone together. I am also grateful that I will have my degree by the time we have a baby, because I know that if I was still in school I would really struggle going back.
The day after our anniversary...I graduate! Yay! I am so excited. I have worked long and hard to get to this point and I am really proud of myself. School isn't really my favorite thing in the world, but I stuck it out and I did really well. I go to a top 100 school and managed to get a 3.8 GPA. Not bad.
From there, I have only one month before I will be finished with my first year of teaching. While I am really excited to be done with this year, because of the accomplishment and the following summer months of free time (my first in 4 years), it is a bit bittersweet. When I think about not seeing my kids anymore it makes me sad. Sometimes they drive me crazy, but I hate being away from them for even one day. I honestly don't know how I'll keep it together the last day.
3 days after the last day of school, Nephi and I leave on vacation. We are going to Seattle for 3 days and Hawaii for 14 days. We had free tickets on Southwest so I just found the cheapest place to fly to Hawaii from and it happened to be Seattle (somewhere I have never been). I decided that since we would be flying there anyway, we might as well spend some time there. We are going to spend a day and a half in Forks. I know it sounds lame, and while I do enjoy Twilight, I am mostly excited to see the green forests. I have never been in a forest like that before so that will be cool. I am also really psyched to go to the tide pools. I went to some tide pools in San Diego and they were lame. I am hoping these aren't...and from what I've read I have high hopes. Then we will spend two days in the actual city of Seattle. We decided to try this site called airbnb.com instead of staying in a hotel. It is this concept where people rent beds in their house. They range from air beds to sofa beds to shared bedrooms to private bedrooms. We found this nice couple who rent their extra room (private) with attached bath for $30 per night (about $70 cheaper than a hotel). I am excited to try this out and see how it works...Nephi is worried.
From Seattle we fly to Maui where we will spend 7 days. We plan on snorkeling, zip lining, hiking, and, of course, lying on the beach. From Maui we spend 3 days on Hawaii (the big island) where we will go to the Volcanos National Park and an observatory. Finally we will be on Oahu for 4 days. There we plan on taking a surfing lesson, going to the luau at the Polynesian Cultural Center, and hiking. Needless to say, I am beyond thrilled. I have always wanted to go to Hawaii and I am excited for the adventure.
A couple weeks after that, Twilight Eclipse comes out. I am pretty excited about that. I have always been someone who likes what I likes and could care less what others think...but that doesn't mean I'm not aware of what others think. I know that people think Twilight is silly, but I do really enjoy it. In fact, I just reread the whole series...in 5 days (this last Thursday-Monday). Yes that is right...I read about 2,445 pages in just 5 days. I know that probably isn't healthy, but I just can't help it. As much as people diss Stephenie Meyer, I just cannot put her books down. In fact, I was so sucked in that once I was finished with Breaking Dawn, I reread The Host. That one took me two days and it is only 619 pages, but I had work and such. This brings up my post title, "priorities." When I start reading...I have no priorities. All I want to do is read. I put off sleeping, eating, and everything else so that I can just keep reading. It is something I really need to work on because it is due to this fact that I don't start reading as often as I would like. I only start reading a book if I know I have time to finish it the the following couple of days. It would be good if I could just read a little bit everyday. Then I could read whatever I want, whenever I want.
This brings me to my final point. I hope to read a lot during the summer. I plan on reading the Fablehaven series, Water for Elephants, Wuthering Heights, and Jane Eyre. Hopefully I will read more than just those, but those are my musts for the summer.
Well...that was a bunch of random mumblings about why I am so excited for the next few months of my life. :)
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Remember
****Spoiler for Remember Me****
Today Nephi and I saw Remember Me. We all know that I love Robert Pattinson (Nephi is fully aware of this and accepts it), so that is why I ventured a viewing. Honestly, I would have been willing to wait until DVD, however, many critics were frustrated by the ending and since I check up on both Eclipse and Robert Pattinson news often, I kept running into possible spoilers. I decided I had to see it before it was ruined.
Though the original purpose was to simply enjoy a couple hours of eye-candy, I actually did like the movie quite a bit. I wouldn't give it a perfect 10, but the characters were likable and fully developed (something that the last few movies I saw in the theater lacked, such as When in Rome, Percy Jackson, and Alice and Wonderland), and the story kept me interested and involved (also important).
Those of you who know me, know I watch movies ALL the time. I love going to movies, but even when I can't, I see almost every movie when it comes to DVD (just about the only perk of having a husband who works at Blockbuster). So, why mention this one on my blog? Well...because even though I wouldn't give it a 10 or anything, it really touched me in a way I wasn't expecting.
The movie begins with the main girl, Ally's, mother being shot and killed by two men on a subway platform in Brooklyn. Ally, only 11, watches as the men rob then kill her mother. It's a scenario that many movies include...yet it feels different. "Ten years later," we are introduced to Tyler as he rushes to a cemetery to meet his family. It is unclear why he is there at first, but throughout the movie you learn that Tyler's older brother, Michael, hanged himself a few years earlier. Both of these events are subtle and seem to simply set up the bigger story, but it is because of these events that I find meaning and purpose in the story.
This movie is clearly about loss. It is set up to make you think it is about love, but it really isn't in my opinion. Both Ally and Tyler had people in their lives who were there for them in one moment, and in the next they were gone. Of course the two meet each other and fall in love, but that is not really the point (as the ending so clearly illustrates).
In the end, Tyler goes to his father's office. His father, in an attempt to be a better father (something that he has sucked at through a majority of the movie), is escorting Tyler's little sister to school and thus is running late. Through a series of shots, you quickly realize that the day is September 11th and Tyler is in the World Trade Center. You know Tyler is going to die, yet you are forced to watch the lives of those around him in that moment: his little sister in school, his father riding to work, his mother on a walk, Ally in the kitchen making French Toast for when Tyler returns. Life going on as always not knowing that within a few minutes, everything will be different because Tyler won't be there anymore. It hurts to watch as each of these characters realize what has just happened--another loss.
It seems a strange coincidence to watch this movie on the eve of the 9th anniversary of my father's death, but life can be funny that way. I wonder if I would have been as reflective otherwise. This movie really hit me in the gut because in truth...it is the thing I am most terrified of. While it has been 9 years since my father died, I have not completely recovered. I still really struggle with the idea of someone being there with you one moment, listening to music in the car, going to the grocery store, enjoying dinner, and the next moment they are on the floor and the whole world seems to be spinning out of control. I am so terrified of the people I love dying. I honestly can't ever even let my mind wander that way for a moment or I find myself having a slight anxiety attack.
In the end of the movie, we see how each character's life is better because Tyler was a part of it. Sometimes we lose people, but they never really leave us. We are different because they were there. I think that I need to remember that a bit more than I do. Life goes on and we remember, and that is important.
Today Nephi and I saw Remember Me. We all know that I love Robert Pattinson (Nephi is fully aware of this and accepts it), so that is why I ventured a viewing. Honestly, I would have been willing to wait until DVD, however, many critics were frustrated by the ending and since I check up on both Eclipse and Robert Pattinson news often, I kept running into possible spoilers. I decided I had to see it before it was ruined.
Though the original purpose was to simply enjoy a couple hours of eye-candy, I actually did like the movie quite a bit. I wouldn't give it a perfect 10, but the characters were likable and fully developed (something that the last few movies I saw in the theater lacked, such as When in Rome, Percy Jackson, and Alice and Wonderland), and the story kept me interested and involved (also important).
Those of you who know me, know I watch movies ALL the time. I love going to movies, but even when I can't, I see almost every movie when it comes to DVD (just about the only perk of having a husband who works at Blockbuster). So, why mention this one on my blog? Well...because even though I wouldn't give it a 10 or anything, it really touched me in a way I wasn't expecting.
The movie begins with the main girl, Ally's, mother being shot and killed by two men on a subway platform in Brooklyn. Ally, only 11, watches as the men rob then kill her mother. It's a scenario that many movies include...yet it feels different. "Ten years later," we are introduced to Tyler as he rushes to a cemetery to meet his family. It is unclear why he is there at first, but throughout the movie you learn that Tyler's older brother, Michael, hanged himself a few years earlier. Both of these events are subtle and seem to simply set up the bigger story, but it is because of these events that I find meaning and purpose in the story.
This movie is clearly about loss. It is set up to make you think it is about love, but it really isn't in my opinion. Both Ally and Tyler had people in their lives who were there for them in one moment, and in the next they were gone. Of course the two meet each other and fall in love, but that is not really the point (as the ending so clearly illustrates).
In the end, Tyler goes to his father's office. His father, in an attempt to be a better father (something that he has sucked at through a majority of the movie), is escorting Tyler's little sister to school and thus is running late. Through a series of shots, you quickly realize that the day is September 11th and Tyler is in the World Trade Center. You know Tyler is going to die, yet you are forced to watch the lives of those around him in that moment: his little sister in school, his father riding to work, his mother on a walk, Ally in the kitchen making French Toast for when Tyler returns. Life going on as always not knowing that within a few minutes, everything will be different because Tyler won't be there anymore. It hurts to watch as each of these characters realize what has just happened--another loss.
It seems a strange coincidence to watch this movie on the eve of the 9th anniversary of my father's death, but life can be funny that way. I wonder if I would have been as reflective otherwise. This movie really hit me in the gut because in truth...it is the thing I am most terrified of. While it has been 9 years since my father died, I have not completely recovered. I still really struggle with the idea of someone being there with you one moment, listening to music in the car, going to the grocery store, enjoying dinner, and the next moment they are on the floor and the whole world seems to be spinning out of control. I am so terrified of the people I love dying. I honestly can't ever even let my mind wander that way for a moment or I find myself having a slight anxiety attack.
In the end of the movie, we see how each character's life is better because Tyler was a part of it. Sometimes we lose people, but they never really leave us. We are different because they were there. I think that I need to remember that a bit more than I do. Life goes on and we remember, and that is important.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Skinny Love...
I am someone who dreams almost every night. While I wouldn't call myself a dream analyzer and I most certainly don't own a dream dictionary or anything, I tend to believe that dreams reveal important things about ourselves and our subconscious thoughts.
For example, growing up I would often have dreams about going to school naked. As a child, I also happened to never do my homework and often stressed about the next day at school. To this day when I have a dream where I show up in public naked, I know that I am subconsciously stressing about being unprepared for something.
For the last few years I have really wanted to lose weight. I am very picky and undisciplined, and I really struggle to eat healthy things. I also find that I am very busy and lack the time required to properly prepare low calorie meals and exercise.
This desire to lose weight has been in the forefront of my mind, especially in the past few months as I start to consider becoming pregnant. While that is awhile off, I really want to be at an ideal weight when I become pregnant so that I can be healthier for my baby. Still, I haven't been able to motivate myself.
Last week I tried putting together a collage of pictures that would help motivate me to eat healthier. You know, a collage of pictures that show good looking men and beautiful women that I could tape in my car and on the refrigerator (I got the idea from a young adult novel called The Earth, My Butt, and Other Big Round Things). I gave up because I couldn't find any girls I wanted to look like (they were either too skinny or too different looking from myself). I just couldn't visualize myself the way I wanted to look. I just knew I wanted to be skinnier.
Well, last night I had a dream. As in most dreams, the logistics don't entirely make sense, but in my dream I was looking myself as I looked when I got married. I was in a bathing suit and dark jeans and I was so skinny. I was skinnier than I have ever been (though not sickly). I woke up feeling inspired that I should look like that in real life. Being able to see me, myself at an ideal weight helped me to decide to go on a diet and to exercise everyday.
Today I spent a good deal of time on the internet looking up the nutritional facts of a lot of the things I eat and I have become convinced it is impossible to eat healthy without a lot of preparation (mostly because it is impossible to eat out and eat healthy). As a picky eater, this becomes very difficult for me (as I detest most fruits and veggies, and I hate-hate-hate left overs). I decided that I have to just buck up and get over it. Eating isn't for enjoyment...it is for energy.
Why do I tell you this? Well...I guess for support. I would love any suggestions you have and if you are someone that I hang out with, maybe you could help me stick with it.
For example, growing up I would often have dreams about going to school naked. As a child, I also happened to never do my homework and often stressed about the next day at school. To this day when I have a dream where I show up in public naked, I know that I am subconsciously stressing about being unprepared for something.
For the last few years I have really wanted to lose weight. I am very picky and undisciplined, and I really struggle to eat healthy things. I also find that I am very busy and lack the time required to properly prepare low calorie meals and exercise.
This desire to lose weight has been in the forefront of my mind, especially in the past few months as I start to consider becoming pregnant. While that is awhile off, I really want to be at an ideal weight when I become pregnant so that I can be healthier for my baby. Still, I haven't been able to motivate myself.
Last week I tried putting together a collage of pictures that would help motivate me to eat healthier. You know, a collage of pictures that show good looking men and beautiful women that I could tape in my car and on the refrigerator (I got the idea from a young adult novel called The Earth, My Butt, and Other Big Round Things). I gave up because I couldn't find any girls I wanted to look like (they were either too skinny or too different looking from myself). I just couldn't visualize myself the way I wanted to look. I just knew I wanted to be skinnier.
Well, last night I had a dream. As in most dreams, the logistics don't entirely make sense, but in my dream I was looking myself as I looked when I got married. I was in a bathing suit and dark jeans and I was so skinny. I was skinnier than I have ever been (though not sickly). I woke up feeling inspired that I should look like that in real life. Being able to see me, myself at an ideal weight helped me to decide to go on a diet and to exercise everyday.
Today I spent a good deal of time on the internet looking up the nutritional facts of a lot of the things I eat and I have become convinced it is impossible to eat healthy without a lot of preparation (mostly because it is impossible to eat out and eat healthy). As a picky eater, this becomes very difficult for me (as I detest most fruits and veggies, and I hate-hate-hate left overs). I decided that I have to just buck up and get over it. Eating isn't for enjoyment...it is for energy.
Why do I tell you this? Well...I guess for support. I would love any suggestions you have and if you are someone that I hang out with, maybe you could help me stick with it.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
I am a vampire...and I have lost my fangs!
So...I know it has been a long time since I have updated. Sorry. I'll try to be better.
I am becoming increasingly frustrated. What is the source of this frustration, you ask? Well, let me tell you. We are now less than five months away from the theatrical release of Twilight: Eclipse and we have yet to have a teaser trailer. What's worse is that Summit has only released a single still from the film. No stills, no posters, no trailers...what is a Twilight news follower to do?
Let me give you a bit of information on why this might bother me so much. For Twilight: New Moon, Summit released the teaser trailer six month prior to its release, and it was actually a pretty good teaser...as in it was over a minute long. Summit also released the first official poster for Twilight: New Moon six months before it came out. Obviously, Summit is way overdue for some new fun stuff for Twilight: Eclipse. My patience is running out.
In other news, this year I decided to try and follow a television show. For those of you who know me, you know that I hate watching weekly television. It is too frustrating. The show takes random weeks off or goes away for over a month (on hiatus). Or you will fall in love with a show only for them to wait until the last minute to cancel it, leaving the entire series with a cliff-hanger ending. Then when you email the network to tell them how rude that is, they send a generic "We are too busy to respond," response so you don't watch that network again...ever (or at least 4 years and counting). Yeah, obviously this has happened to me.
I should say it isn't ALWAYS the network's fault, sometimes life gets in the way. Like you have to chaperon a dance for junior high schoolers, or you have parent teacher conferences, you know...the usual, that cause you to miss the show on the assigned night. Or your internal clock sucks and every Thursday your mind goes, "Bing! It's Thursday!" Then you look at the clock only to find out that it is 8:05, 5 minutes after your show ENDS! Yeah, that has happened to me the last three weeks.
Clearly, not the best at following a weekly television show, though I must say that the internet has made it easier. Unfortunately for me my show of choice is on the CW which waits about 5 days before posting the show. Oh well, at least I get to see it before I watch the next weeks (on the internet five days late because I forgot again). Haha.
I was weary to tell people what show I have become hooked on for fear of over generalizations being made about me, but since I haven't missed an episode this season, I figure I am an official fan and might as well make it known.
I am watching The Vampire Diaries on CW. Now since I have a semi-obsession with Twilight (primarily because of my appreciation of the books and beautiful Robert Pattinson), I worry that people will think I am obsessed with all things vampire...and that is simply not the case. I suppose the reason I have been into vampires as of late is because there have been major changes in the genre. Instead of taking, taking, taking, these new vampires give and refrain. I guess I am an old mushy romantic. I like the idea of a guy waiting hundreds of years to find one girl to love. These vampires are major protectors and are always around shielding and loving. I don't know...I must have some deep rooted desire to be adored and worshiped by a man that makes this concept appeal to me. Regardless...it does. I know that if I ever met one of these such creatures in real life I should run as fast as possible, but I like it in theory.
So here's to Summit releasing a trailer for Eclipse and for the universe to align for me to be able to watch The Vampire Diaries (though that won't be happening this week as I have to...you guessed...chaperon a dance).
I am becoming increasingly frustrated. What is the source of this frustration, you ask? Well, let me tell you. We are now less than five months away from the theatrical release of Twilight: Eclipse and we have yet to have a teaser trailer. What's worse is that Summit has only released a single still from the film. No stills, no posters, no trailers...what is a Twilight news follower to do?
Let me give you a bit of information on why this might bother me so much. For Twilight: New Moon, Summit released the teaser trailer six month prior to its release, and it was actually a pretty good teaser...as in it was over a minute long. Summit also released the first official poster for Twilight: New Moon six months before it came out. Obviously, Summit is way overdue for some new fun stuff for Twilight: Eclipse. My patience is running out.
In other news, this year I decided to try and follow a television show. For those of you who know me, you know that I hate watching weekly television. It is too frustrating. The show takes random weeks off or goes away for over a month (on hiatus). Or you will fall in love with a show only for them to wait until the last minute to cancel it, leaving the entire series with a cliff-hanger ending. Then when you email the network to tell them how rude that is, they send a generic "We are too busy to respond," response so you don't watch that network again...ever (or at least 4 years and counting). Yeah, obviously this has happened to me.
I should say it isn't ALWAYS the network's fault, sometimes life gets in the way. Like you have to chaperon a dance for junior high schoolers, or you have parent teacher conferences, you know...the usual, that cause you to miss the show on the assigned night. Or your internal clock sucks and every Thursday your mind goes, "Bing! It's Thursday!" Then you look at the clock only to find out that it is 8:05, 5 minutes after your show ENDS! Yeah, that has happened to me the last three weeks.
Clearly, not the best at following a weekly television show, though I must say that the internet has made it easier. Unfortunately for me my show of choice is on the CW which waits about 5 days before posting the show. Oh well, at least I get to see it before I watch the next weeks (on the internet five days late because I forgot again). Haha.
I was weary to tell people what show I have become hooked on for fear of over generalizations being made about me, but since I haven't missed an episode this season, I figure I am an official fan and might as well make it known.
I am watching The Vampire Diaries on CW. Now since I have a semi-obsession with Twilight (primarily because of my appreciation of the books and beautiful Robert Pattinson), I worry that people will think I am obsessed with all things vampire...and that is simply not the case. I suppose the reason I have been into vampires as of late is because there have been major changes in the genre. Instead of taking, taking, taking, these new vampires give and refrain. I guess I am an old mushy romantic. I like the idea of a guy waiting hundreds of years to find one girl to love. These vampires are major protectors and are always around shielding and loving. I don't know...I must have some deep rooted desire to be adored and worshiped by a man that makes this concept appeal to me. Regardless...it does. I know that if I ever met one of these such creatures in real life I should run as fast as possible, but I like it in theory.
So here's to Summit releasing a trailer for Eclipse and for the universe to align for me to be able to watch The Vampire Diaries (though that won't be happening this week as I have to...you guessed...chaperon a dance).
Monday, January 11, 2010
Movies!
For those of you who don't know...I'm kinda a movie person. No...really. I watch movies ALL the time. I don't know if a single week in my whole life has passed by without me watching a movie. Usually I watch more than one. Some people may think me naughty, but if I didn't watch rated R movies, I may have run out of movies long ago. Thankfully they keep making more, so I've never run out. I am also thankful that I found a husband who shares this same passion.
See, my husband works at Blockbuster (which most of you probably know). We get 5 free rentals per week. It's pretty nice. Moreover, Nephi is OBSESSED with owning every movie he has ever liked. And he can't just own the movie, he has to have the super, awesome, amazing, fantastic, deluxe, ultimate, collectors edition. I would say over half of the movies we own have more than one disk. Well...this has kind of rubbed off on me, so we have a pretty eclectic collection. For example, while we only own 393 titles, those 393 titles consist of 629 disks. Yeah, we take it pretty seriously.
Anyway, I am a person who must have something going on in the background (visual) if I am going to get anything done. I really don't get people who are able to go into a quiet room or library and just work. I end up staring at the wall or the ceiling or (my favorite) the clock. I found that if I put a movie on while I worked I actually got work done faster. Instead of having to take 5 minute breaks every 10 minutes, I take little 5 second breaks every couple of minutes. It works better for me that way. I am a multi-tasker, what can I say. Knowing this, and knowing that I took 21 credits last winter, went to school full time in the summer while preparing for my internship, and am now an intern who preps, grades, etc., and who was also working on a 70 page Teacher Work Sample, it is safe to say I have watched a TON of movies over the last year.
Last night as I was grading and watching movies I felt like I wanted to share some of my favorite movies and characters. I should mention that I realize that not all this movies are cinema gold. They are just movies that I really enjoy watching over and over again.
Favorite Movies:
The Prince of Egypt - So...maybe it seems lame to put this as one of my favorite movies, but it really is. I love the story, the characters, and the music. Some people think the Ten Commandments is better; they are wrong. Something I love about The Prince of Egypt is that they do such a great job at portraying Moses as a real person...not some scary weirdo. I can relate to Moses' struggle with his own insignificance. I can feel it when he finally understand that he has been chosen by God. I love that the first thing he wants to do is tell his wife. I love it. Seriously. I cry EVERY time and I feel the Spirit EVERY time. Not all movies can do that.
Air Force One - Again...am I seriously putting a popcorn action movie on my favorites list? The answer is yes. I always enjoy this movie. It always makes me feel so patriotic. I love that Harrison Ford is a president with integrity, who can also kick people's trash. I would totally vote for him. I also love that people are willing to sacrifice their lives for him in multiple parts throughout the movie. Plus Gary Oldman does such a great job as an evil Russian guy. I used to think he was a Russian guy...until I realized it was Gary Oldman (which was like...2 years ago). Haha. This movie also has some of the best one-liners. "Get off my plane!" then he pulls the ripcord and CRACK! Then there's the, "Hahaha! The good guys are here!" as the American fighter pilots get there to kick some MIG (no clue if I spelled that right) butt. Anyway, this is an awesome one.
Disaster Movies - Okay...so I should probably specify which ones, but I just can't. I love any and all disaster movies: Armageddon, Deep Impact, Dante's Peak, The Day After Tomorrow, Independence Day, War of the Worlds. Oh man, they make my day. I have no idea why I love this genre so much, but I really do. I really, really do. I watch these listed movies over and over again and it never gets old.
Saved! - While I don't want to watch this movie everyday, I really do love it. It has some hilarious humor, though it is hard to appreciate if you have never experienced that culture. This movie also has some awesome one-liners. "I am filled with Christ's love!" as Hillary proceeds to angrily throw a Bible at Mary's back. Another favorite is when Hillary proclaims, "I just ran my van in Jesus!" Yeah...it's good.
Pride and Prejudice - Don't even think about a 6 hour version of Pride and Prejudice. I would shoot myself. I am talking about the one with Keira Knightley. The first time I saw this movie...I really didn't like it. Why? Because I hate Keira Knightley. I can't stand her...and I couldn't believe she got nominated for best actress in this role. Seriously...she is so bad. However, she is pretty good for the part of Elizabeth. It just works. It takes a while to get over her weirdo smile and annoying laugh, but if you can...you really can ignore that Keira Knightley is in it. Haha. After watching it again though, I fell in love with it and now I watch it all the time. It makes me happy. I should also say that I am not a fan of the book. Not at all, so the fact that I love this movie so much says something. A big part of it is the director, Joe Wright. He does such a good job with the cinematography and the music. He also did Atonement which is a good one.
Return to Me - I can't believe I'm admitting this, but I was DRAGGED to this movie in the theaters. I wanted to see some kids movie (I can't remember what), and I was seriously annoyed that this was our choice. However, even at 14 I loved this film. It's so good. I laugh so hard every time I watch it. It is also touching and sweet. The characters are dynamic and exciting. Again...one-liners. My personal favorite is, "I have never said 'Hell' you son of a bitch," when Megan is scolding her husband for teaching their children bad words. Love it!
17 Again - This is one of my newer favorites. Zac Efron (while a complete idiot, from what I gather in interviews), does such a good job in this movie. He is soooo cute and plays this part perfectly. Playing an old man as a young guy really works for him. The awkward situations that he finds himself in are so awesomely horrible. Like when his daughter tries to seduce him, or when he convinces his whole health class that abstinence is best. It is hilarious. Moreover, Zac Efron does a good job with the emotional stuff too. At the end when he is telling his wife why he loves her...you feel it. Of course, the real show stealer is his "dad," Ned. This character is so ridiculously funny. You really should see it if you haven't.
The Fifth Element - While not the most amazing movie overall, this was a family favorite. What I love about it is it's dry humor. Mostly...I love Chris Tucker as Ruby Rhod. "Korben...Korben...I ain't got no fire!"
Well...I should probably stop, because I could keep going forever. There are many others.
If you are interested, this is a list of all of the movies we own.
See, my husband works at Blockbuster (which most of you probably know). We get 5 free rentals per week. It's pretty nice. Moreover, Nephi is OBSESSED with owning every movie he has ever liked. And he can't just own the movie, he has to have the super, awesome, amazing, fantastic, deluxe, ultimate, collectors edition. I would say over half of the movies we own have more than one disk. Well...this has kind of rubbed off on me, so we have a pretty eclectic collection. For example, while we only own 393 titles, those 393 titles consist of 629 disks. Yeah, we take it pretty seriously.
Anyway, I am a person who must have something going on in the background (visual) if I am going to get anything done. I really don't get people who are able to go into a quiet room or library and just work. I end up staring at the wall or the ceiling or (my favorite) the clock. I found that if I put a movie on while I worked I actually got work done faster. Instead of having to take 5 minute breaks every 10 minutes, I take little 5 second breaks every couple of minutes. It works better for me that way. I am a multi-tasker, what can I say. Knowing this, and knowing that I took 21 credits last winter, went to school full time in the summer while preparing for my internship, and am now an intern who preps, grades, etc., and who was also working on a 70 page Teacher Work Sample, it is safe to say I have watched a TON of movies over the last year.
Last night as I was grading and watching movies I felt like I wanted to share some of my favorite movies and characters. I should mention that I realize that not all this movies are cinema gold. They are just movies that I really enjoy watching over and over again.
Favorite Movies:
The Prince of Egypt - So...maybe it seems lame to put this as one of my favorite movies, but it really is. I love the story, the characters, and the music. Some people think the Ten Commandments is better; they are wrong. Something I love about The Prince of Egypt is that they do such a great job at portraying Moses as a real person...not some scary weirdo. I can relate to Moses' struggle with his own insignificance. I can feel it when he finally understand that he has been chosen by God. I love that the first thing he wants to do is tell his wife. I love it. Seriously. I cry EVERY time and I feel the Spirit EVERY time. Not all movies can do that.
Air Force One - Again...am I seriously putting a popcorn action movie on my favorites list? The answer is yes. I always enjoy this movie. It always makes me feel so patriotic. I love that Harrison Ford is a president with integrity, who can also kick people's trash. I would totally vote for him. I also love that people are willing to sacrifice their lives for him in multiple parts throughout the movie. Plus Gary Oldman does such a great job as an evil Russian guy. I used to think he was a Russian guy...until I realized it was Gary Oldman (which was like...2 years ago). Haha. This movie also has some of the best one-liners. "Get off my plane!" then he pulls the ripcord and CRACK! Then there's the, "Hahaha! The good guys are here!" as the American fighter pilots get there to kick some MIG (no clue if I spelled that right) butt. Anyway, this is an awesome one.
Disaster Movies - Okay...so I should probably specify which ones, but I just can't. I love any and all disaster movies: Armageddon, Deep Impact, Dante's Peak, The Day After Tomorrow, Independence Day, War of the Worlds. Oh man, they make my day. I have no idea why I love this genre so much, but I really do. I really, really do. I watch these listed movies over and over again and it never gets old.
Saved! - While I don't want to watch this movie everyday, I really do love it. It has some hilarious humor, though it is hard to appreciate if you have never experienced that culture. This movie also has some awesome one-liners. "I am filled with Christ's love!" as Hillary proceeds to angrily throw a Bible at Mary's back. Another favorite is when Hillary proclaims, "I just ran my van in Jesus!" Yeah...it's good.
Pride and Prejudice - Don't even think about a 6 hour version of Pride and Prejudice. I would shoot myself. I am talking about the one with Keira Knightley. The first time I saw this movie...I really didn't like it. Why? Because I hate Keira Knightley. I can't stand her...and I couldn't believe she got nominated for best actress in this role. Seriously...she is so bad. However, she is pretty good for the part of Elizabeth. It just works. It takes a while to get over her weirdo smile and annoying laugh, but if you can...you really can ignore that Keira Knightley is in it. Haha. After watching it again though, I fell in love with it and now I watch it all the time. It makes me happy. I should also say that I am not a fan of the book. Not at all, so the fact that I love this movie so much says something. A big part of it is the director, Joe Wright. He does such a good job with the cinematography and the music. He also did Atonement which is a good one.
Return to Me - I can't believe I'm admitting this, but I was DRAGGED to this movie in the theaters. I wanted to see some kids movie (I can't remember what), and I was seriously annoyed that this was our choice. However, even at 14 I loved this film. It's so good. I laugh so hard every time I watch it. It is also touching and sweet. The characters are dynamic and exciting. Again...one-liners. My personal favorite is, "I have never said 'Hell' you son of a bitch," when Megan is scolding her husband for teaching their children bad words. Love it!
17 Again - This is one of my newer favorites. Zac Efron (while a complete idiot, from what I gather in interviews), does such a good job in this movie. He is soooo cute and plays this part perfectly. Playing an old man as a young guy really works for him. The awkward situations that he finds himself in are so awesomely horrible. Like when his daughter tries to seduce him, or when he convinces his whole health class that abstinence is best. It is hilarious. Moreover, Zac Efron does a good job with the emotional stuff too. At the end when he is telling his wife why he loves her...you feel it. Of course, the real show stealer is his "dad," Ned. This character is so ridiculously funny. You really should see it if you haven't.
The Fifth Element - While not the most amazing movie overall, this was a family favorite. What I love about it is it's dry humor. Mostly...I love Chris Tucker as Ruby Rhod. "Korben...Korben...I ain't got no fire!"
Well...I should probably stop, because I could keep going forever. There are many others.
If you are interested, this is a list of all of the movies we own.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Finally
So, even though I'm sure no one will read it, I finally decided to join the blogging world. I don't know why exactly. I guess sometimes I just want to vent or give jubilation and I don't really want to bug my husband or a friend. This way if I do those things and someone wants to share in my pain or joy, they can. However, if they don't, I'm not forcing them to.
I also find that writing things out helps me better understand my own feelings, and it can make it easier to move on (if things are bad) or keep feeling happy (if things are good). It also helps me to work through problems.
Mostly, I am by myself a lot. Sometimes I want something to do other than work and movies. We'll see how well I keep it up.
So now that I've discussed why I decided to start a blog, I figure I should write an actual entry.
Things I am Thankful For:
Over a year ago I was driving back to Utah from Colorado. I was passing a truck and I suddenly thought of the life of a trucker. They spend their whole lives in the car. They are constantly dealing with dumb drivers and bad weather. It made me grateful that I wasn't a trucker. And suddenly I realized all of the things I wouldn't have without truckers, which made realize how grateful I am that I don't have to do those sorts of things. But not in a, "Thank goodness I'm not a trucker" kind of way, but rather a "Thank goodness there are people who are willing to do that" kind of way. It made me realize that sometimes I can be sort of negative. There are so many things in this world to be grateful for, even truckers. I think we need to focus more on the great things in our lives. There are so many things.
I am grateful for truckers (obviously). I am grateful for the mountains and the ocean. I am grateful for my students and how my job doesn't feel like a job. I am grateful for animals and how happy they make me. I am grateful for friends who put up with me and know me, but still love me. I am grateful for trash collectors and the people who prepare my meat. I am grateful for this country and the numerous benefits it provides. I am grateful for my crazy sisters, even though they are just that...crazy. I am grateful for music and how it makes me feel closer to God than anything else. I am grateful for movies and how they influence my life and choices. I am grateful to be a part of the gospel. Finally, I am so grateful for my husband. I love my family and I know they love me, but they have to put up with me. Nephi doesn't, yet he is here everyday loving me and supporting me in all that I do. I am grateful that it feels so natural to love him. These are just a few of the things I am grateful for. I wish I could keep going, but I could go on and on forever.
Well, I am grateful for you! Thanks for reading my first blog post.
I also find that writing things out helps me better understand my own feelings, and it can make it easier to move on (if things are bad) or keep feeling happy (if things are good). It also helps me to work through problems.
Mostly, I am by myself a lot. Sometimes I want something to do other than work and movies. We'll see how well I keep it up.
So now that I've discussed why I decided to start a blog, I figure I should write an actual entry.
Things I am Thankful For:
Over a year ago I was driving back to Utah from Colorado. I was passing a truck and I suddenly thought of the life of a trucker. They spend their whole lives in the car. They are constantly dealing with dumb drivers and bad weather. It made me grateful that I wasn't a trucker. And suddenly I realized all of the things I wouldn't have without truckers, which made realize how grateful I am that I don't have to do those sorts of things. But not in a, "Thank goodness I'm not a trucker" kind of way, but rather a "Thank goodness there are people who are willing to do that" kind of way. It made me realize that sometimes I can be sort of negative. There are so many things in this world to be grateful for, even truckers. I think we need to focus more on the great things in our lives. There are so many things.
I am grateful for truckers (obviously). I am grateful for the mountains and the ocean. I am grateful for my students and how my job doesn't feel like a job. I am grateful for animals and how happy they make me. I am grateful for friends who put up with me and know me, but still love me. I am grateful for trash collectors and the people who prepare my meat. I am grateful for this country and the numerous benefits it provides. I am grateful for my crazy sisters, even though they are just that...crazy. I am grateful for music and how it makes me feel closer to God than anything else. I am grateful for movies and how they influence my life and choices. I am grateful to be a part of the gospel. Finally, I am so grateful for my husband. I love my family and I know they love me, but they have to put up with me. Nephi doesn't, yet he is here everyday loving me and supporting me in all that I do. I am grateful that it feels so natural to love him. These are just a few of the things I am grateful for. I wish I could keep going, but I could go on and on forever.
Well, I am grateful for you! Thanks for reading my first blog post.
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